Sunday, September 6, 2009
random change
you know...
i find myself very different..
for once in my life,
i feel like making a difference...
i've watched many movies,
read many books,
and most had one thing in common...
that is,
making a difference in something...
these made me think..
what had i done in life
that made a difference??
i thought and thought...
and i couldn't seem to find any answer...
i thought,
maybe primary school?
wat have i done..?
big mistakes....
friends..?
never true ones...
grades..?
as bad as ever...
nvr did i put in efort for malay...
as for science..
miracle i got through...
maybe secondary school?
wat have i done..?
began conflicts...
changed attitude...
cca..?
not even an effort made...
my goal for it,
i could never achieve...
friends..?
found true ones..
but what kind of a friend am i to them?
all i do is irritated & make fun of them!
studies..?
everything began dropping..
sec 1,
sure,
SECOND top in class for maths..
so what?
what about now?
not even close to top 10!
family..?
what have i ever done to them?
my parents...?
all i've done is make them angry...
being active in sjab,
going out with friends,
breaking fast outside,
never satisfied at home,
yelled at them for yelling at me...
is this wat i was born to do?
i thought...
and thought..
and thought...
and now,
i want to make a difference in life...
i want to be who my parents want me to be..
i'll prove to them that
i can beat my cousins.
i can be smart.
i can be the litlle girl they used to love.
i can make myown decisions.
and i can be that perfect daughter
ALL parents want...
now that eoys are coming,
i will give it my 100%...
all i would ask in return from them,
is let me give my 100% in my passions too...
i've come to realised,
maybe i'm taking things for granted...
no more distractions...
now, all i wanna do
is to make an improvement in my studies..
to to atleast get a,
"good job." from boths parents..
if i am able to achieve this small thing,
then i know..
i know i've made a big difference for them...
maybe after exams i'll go out more?
and pherhaps,
i'll be recognised for just who i am?
unwritten! atSunday, September 06, 2009
